I had the privledge of supporting a friend through the last stages of breast cancer about 10 years ago. Kris, an elementary teacher and a thoughtful, caring lady, was chronically-obsessively doing for others. She had extra -- bins and bins of gifts and thank you cards and
One day she and I were talking about how to manage weekly grocery shopping during her chemo treatments. I had young children at home and couldn't offer my help, but others were offering. She was completely resistant to accepting help. It was as though saying yes, was admitting defeat. Defeated by cancer, defeated by her fatigue, defeated by the responsibilities of being a wife, mother and teacher all the while fighting one of the most agressive forms of breast cancer on record.
Showing support for others who are experiencing difficult times can be....awkward and agonizing.
My friend found that her lesson was to be the one who needs help and to learn to accept it gracefully. Her gift to others was to say yes to their offers. Next time you are offered assistance, stop before you say no. Can you give a gift of saying yes?